so i was sitting on my side of the street eating a digital peach static dripping from my teeth sitting, watching, thinking (mind on simmer, heart in hand feet secured to street, mission: breathe as much oxygen as possible) Internal diagnostics complete digital colors are just mathematical expressions the orange man in the orange jumpsuit looks a little blue looks a little green any moment now, he’s going to spew press one if you need a hug press two if you need a canoe press three if you need to pee and that’s when i saw you on your side of the street eating an analog frog we play mirror cats all day long then you yell to me: we have no peaches on this side of the street could you text one to me? and i yell back: just eat the fucking frog boo-doo-dooo i’m sorry, the number you are trying to reach doesn’t want to reach back, perhaps you’re boring, perhaps your breath stinks get a life, get a breathmint, get some real friends and try again sometimes i have i.o,t. nightmares last night i overheard the toaster talking to the blender about the vacuum cleaner and all that stuff we did (last night was quite a bender, everyone toasted good thing i have a vacuum cleaner with a non-discloser agreement and dolphin-free disposable dirt) yes, i hear voices normally this frequency only gives me weather reports but then lightning strikes and blam! frankly my dear i don’t give a damn kaboom! mets leading reds with runners in scoring position kablam again and andy and opie go fishing i thought i was going crazy turns out i was sitting on the remote someday, all my favorite foods will fall directly into my mouth from a wormhole grocery store app in the sky please place your (bananas) in the bag someday, employers will replace all paychecks with lottery tickets and only some of us get paid oh wait, that’s now place your (i can’t believe it’s not butter) in the bag looking over my bank statements retracing my digital footprints updating my oddly romantic serial number i realize my identity is better off without me and i need a hug place your (hug) in the bag and take your receipt
and thank you sunra rainz for writing the line “just eat the fucking frog” it’s become one of my favorite expressions
posted for earthweal
jalopy dreams 
A terrifying dystopia. The raw tone of the poem adds to the nihilism. I liked this a lot.
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Lighting never strikes the same place twice, so if you think so , you’re probably sitting on the remote. Lots of digital heat lightning here taking a wicked delight in the spew.
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that’s actually a true story, i took a nap on the sofa the other day, rolled over onto the remote, pressing both the volume and channel buttons at the same time, scared the hell out of me, its a terrible way to wake up =)
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Philip your poetry never fails to tick all my boxes. Here we get dystopia in full measure, paradox and parallel, analog and digital, all in a snow globe of cognitive dissonance that yet manages to hit the nail directly on the fruit basket. The toaster obviously knows too much, but what can you do, and how do you clean a vacuum anyway? I mean, there’s nothing there, right? This ranges from wry to sly, and everything in between–“i thought i was going crazy/
turns out i was sitting on the remote…” seems to cover most of the insanity raging around us and even within us as our programming fragments and repeats. It’s always good to read our work, Philip. We have to feed each other with words when we run out of bananas.
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“your work” not our. Yeesh.
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thanks joy. not sure i can call this a poem yet, just a lot of riffing, playing around with various automated messages one might encounter on any average american day, it’ll be interesting to see where it goes, or if it goes
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I LOVE the voice in this, conversational, drawing the reader right in. I LOVE “just eat the fucking frog”, a line anyone would be pleased to write. Smiles. The irony about the paychecks is something I relate to. The biggest “advance” in our current reality is how diminished our incomes are, how much less it buys. An extremely enjoyable read. I love where you took it.
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“eating a digital peach
static dripping from my teeth”
That is so cool. Also this:
“mind on simmer, heart in hand
feet secured to street, mission:
breathe as much oxygen as possible”
(It kind of sounds like the peach is your own heart … i.e., eat your heart out.)
I love the 123 list. … 3. I am always a 3. 🙂
Get some real friends and try again. Harsh. But really good advice.
The remote control section was funny, the lottery ticket paycheck was sad.
My very favorite line: “updating my oddly romantic serial number” … liked the lines after that as well.
I’m happy you’re writing and sharing poems. You are so talented.
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thank you shawna
“Get some real friends and try again. Harsh. But really good advice.” yes, advise i plan on taking, and thank you for being a great friend =)
yeah, i’m a 3 too, but also a 1. thanks again shawna
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That was definitely crisp and original. I had to wonder with all appliance chatting was Alexa in the house eavesdropping? The opening line really pulled me to see where you were going. I was not disappointed. Fav line
mind on simmer, heart in hand…I wonder if we will be able to afford anything in the future. Paychecks in the form of lottery tickets that no one wins but, the employer. ugh…
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Modern life, encapsulated! Surely it can only get worse before it gets better?
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such an accurate description of our fragmented existence…
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Phillip, what a joy to read this! You made me laugh with the frog line! I love how you incorporated it 😀 :-D.
This whole write is delightful, so full of mind-boggling matrix-like imagery. And somehow you manage to pack an emotional punch amidst all the dry humour. I love it, honestly. These lines are beaut:
“eating a digital peach
static dripping from my teeth”
“we play mirror cats all day long
then you yell to me: we have no peaches on this side of the street
could you text one to me?
and i yell back: just eat the fucking frog”
“last night i overheard the toaster talking to the blender
about the vacuum cleaner and all that stuff we did”
“i thought i was going crazy
turns out i was sitting on the remote”
“someday, all my favorite foods will fall directly into my mouth
from a wormhole grocery store app in the sky”
“i realize my identity is better off without me
and i need a hug”
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well, thank you for writing that line, even some of my friends are starting to use it ( you’re a true poet now, your words have escaped the page and are running wild in the real world, you go girl!)
yes, it’s an interesting poemish thing, lots of riffing and flow of consciousness, i have idea where it will eventually go, glad you enjoyed it
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